Wednesday, October 27, 2010

on re-entry

It's been nearly three days since I've returned from our amazing yoga teacher training in Tulum. So, so bittersweet.

There is the part of me that is so flippin' happy to be back in Kentucky. So wonderful to see and be with Andy (and Bella and Remy too). So grounding for me to back at the Big Blue House. So comforting to be able to talk to family and friends whenever I want. So good for me to be back at the studio and see the students that I adore so much. Walking into the studio for the first time yesterday and being met with such a loving force, and a clean sparkly studio/treehouse (thanks Lisa!).


But it's a challenge at the same time. I find that everytime I come back from Tulum, I am such a sensitive soul. Even more so this time. I think mostly because the intensity and the nature of what I was doing. Plus all the students (who are now teachers) were even more special than I dreamed they would be. This experience was such a dream come true. A mondo beyondo dream come true.

I'm taking extra care of my Self this week. Attempting to anyway, particularly in these ways::

1. Grounding myself at home. Sunday night when Andy is driving me home he asks what I'm doing tomorrow (Monday). I tell him I need to go to the studio and do some things. He asks if that's a good idea. His simple question of this made me realize that no, it's probably not a good idea. So Monday was spent at home. Near my home. My old old house has enough to hold me and all my sensitve and tender parts. I feel safe here. The Big Blue Abode is very good for me. I gave myself the gift of her for a full day. Thank you Andy for being my teacher and knowing better than me what I needed.

2. Connecting to nature. On Monday and Tuesday I spent about an hour walking in the cemetery next to my home. Monday I enjoyed the walk with my dogs. Yesterday I went alone and whirled around the cemetery several times and listened to inspiring and uplifting tunes and words. After living so close to nature for over two weeks I find this is a must. I walk and say the words of e.e. cummings....I Thank You. And feel connected. To nature in general. To all in the universe. Walks in nature too are very good for me.

3. Grounding practices, such as yoga, meditation, and self massage (abhyanga). On Monday I spent two full hours in my yoga room. I got to add a few extra things to my sacred space and altar. Good luck beads gifted to me from a student in Peru, a big seedlike thing from our Tulum altar, and a card from a student. My practice was sllloooowww and grouding. No sun salutations. I just let my body move in the ways it wished. Intuitive at first. Then longer holds of yin poses. I let my breath do it's own thing. I finished with some singing/chanting/kirtan and meditation. I'm also taking time for daily self massage.

4. Being aware of my own energy. Drawing in when and where I need to. Giving and sharing when I need to. Knowing that I'm super sensitive right now. And not dwelling on all my thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Giving myself permission to experience all and let them move on through. Easier said than done. I apologize in advance family and friends. :)

What about you?
Have you been to such a place,
done such a thing,
that is resonated so much for you,
that it blows your heart apart,
and leaves you putting the fragile pieces back together?

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